The Arkham Approach
by ManneQuinn
Summary: When a new form of reform for the patients is introduced, a new doctor appears.
1. Chapter 1

**The Arkham Approach**

Arkham was habitually noisy, however, on one particular day, there was something that had triggered the inmates of Arkham to go completely out of control.

They all knew something was going on, their doctors had been acting strangely the past few days, and had been checking on their cells more than usual. There had even been visits from big, fancy politicians, who must have been there to look at what "progress" the patients were making.

Sensing something was wrong, and after conferring their thoughts over meals at the cafeteria, rumours spread around (who had started them was something unknown) about what the doctors had in store for them. One theory was that they were going to transfer them all to different states because the hospital had ran out of funding. Another theory was that the recreation rooms would be banned, and so the patients would never see another soul.

They were all desperate to know what lay in wait for them.

And they were sick of waiting.

All of them cried, or slammed their heads against the walls, grabbing attention wherever they could. Others sang or danced, or happily rambled to themselves. Some just shouted, laughing hysterically when they heard that someone else had heard, and yelled back.

_Everyone_ knew something knew was going on, and _everyone_ wanted to know what it was.

Well - everyone apart from the supercriminals in the Maximum Security unit.

Calendar Man had been the first to hear the raucous cries from the lower wings, halting his rambling rhymes which caught the other villains' attention.

"What the heavens is that racket?!" the Mad Hatter said to himself, placing his novel down onto his crumpled cot, standing on his tiptoes to peer out of his door's eye slit.

He could just see a pair of eyes meeting his from the cell across from him. It was Crane, clearly, he'd had the same idea as his friend, Tetch.

"Jervis!" Jonathan shouted over to the shorter man, smacking his hand against his dense metal door. "I cannot read due to this infernal noise from these damned imbeciles!"

"Me either Jonathan!" Tetch replied, having to yell even louder as the ambience grew in volume.

"We ought to do something about it!"

"Yes! But first friend, we must find out what the source of the sudden liveliness is!"

"I agree Jervis!"

As the riot continued around them, armed guards marched down the walkway between the cells. A line of them passed the Mad Hatter and Scarecrow's view, beady eyes peeping out of the small oblong boxes.

"Perhaps someone is escaping!" Tetch yelled again, waiting longer than he liked for Crane's reply.

"No Jervis! I think, from what I've seen, that Arkham has a new form of... _care_ they would like to offer!" Before he could ask his friend to elaborate, a slow, shallow snigger came from a few cells down, already reverberating out and into the corridor.

Both Scarecrow and Hatter immediately sunk below eye level so they were out of sight, and kept to their beds. Soon the snigger grew into a little chuckle, already the asylum's patient ambience had lessened slightly.

"Jesus Christ!" a nearby guard murmured, close to Jervis' cell door, referring to the now deafening rumble of unmistakable laughter. An instant hush fell because of it, the only other sound was the ragged breaths from each patient.

The Joker was up to something.

Or rather - he knew something everyone else didn't.


	2. Chapter 2

**The Arkham Approach**

"You're going to _educate_ us?! How old do you think we are?!" Crane hissed, taking an uncomfortable seat at one of the cramped desks towards the middle.

"Yes," a man with a lab coat and thin framed glasses said, clutching his clipboard to his chest. "I believe that if we can educate you, it will help you to reform and behave better in the outside world."

The other patients from Maximum Security trailed behind, taking a seat behind a desk. Naturally the more badass of the lot decided to sit right at the back, the others seemed a little annoyed about this, but let it slide.

"In these sessions, you are allowed to freely socialize and interact with people as much as you wish, just like in the recreation area. And you can leave anytime you want, however, you will be expected to keep to your cell when the others are in lessons."

"What kinda stuff do we learn about?" Two-face cut in gruffly, looking at the other patients, in order to check who was around him.

"Well this week you will have taster lessons, and then you'll get to vote for the best lessons, and which ones you would be interested in continuing. The first lesson today is Citizen Studies."

"Does that include politics?" Ivy asked, her gleaming eyes shifting towards Harvey who was sat on the desk next to her. The doctor nodded and she smiled, crossing her arms over.

"What other lessons would be on the curriculum?" Tetch questioned, leaning forward eagerly, earning a loud yawn and rolled eyes from a certain clown at the very back of the room.

The skinny doctor took his clipboard away from his chest, scanning over the list and reading its contents. "Geography, Science, Literature - " Crane and Tetch smiled - "Citizen Studies, Music, Drama and Art."

The Riddler sighed, "Math. They would _always_ have to leave out math."

"That's because no one likes it." Harvey replied, lifting an eyebrow.

The doctor cleared his throat, "Lastly, before I go, please respect this opportunity you have. This will be a great way for you to reform, so please learn something from these lessons, and get to know the doctors who will be teaching you."

A snigger came from the back.

The doctor soon walked towards the door, nodding towards the other doctor who had just entered.

The class of patients sat in silence, each of them facing forwards and giving the blonde woman at the front an icy glare. Everyone except the Joker, who swung back on his chair, gazing up at the ceiling as the chair creaked when he rocked to and fro.

The young woman cleared her throat, turning away from them as she took a black board pen from her lab coat pocket. An irritating squeak came from the pen as she began to write something on the whiteboard on the wall, her heart pounding as one of them let out a deep sigh. Which one? She gulped, trying to compose herself.

"What is your name?" Crane finally broke the silence, knowing she was nervous as she turned around sharply, blue eyes wide as she stared at him.

"I-I'm Dr Quinzel."

Joker's chair stopped creaking and the back chair legs scraped the floor a little as the front ones collided with the ground. Everyone suddenly noticed how quiet Joker had been - usually he couldn't keep his mouth shut, yet he hadn't said a single word since entering. Clearly he was up to something. Then again, he wasn't known to be very_ predictable_.

No one turned around to look at him, they all made sure they were facing Dr Quinzel instead, because they knew he would be smiling.

They knew because of Dr Quinzel's reaction: her cyan eyes were drawn to him and she had a frightened look on her face, her hand clawed around the whiteboard marker, the lid clattering to the floor and the silence was disrupted once again. Despite her intimidation she managed to tear herself away from Joker's stare, taking a deep breath.

"Okay let's start with today's topic," she began, her voice a little shaky as she gestured towards the board. "Perception."

Crane and Tetch groaned, whilst Ivy and Harvey looked at each other with smiles. "I think we know what is right and what is wrong Dr Quinzel." Riddler snapped patronizingly, narrowing his eyes. She swallowed and blushed, standing awkwardly.

_"Hey!"_ Joker suddenly blurted out shooting up to a standing position, as he faced the Riddler, a grin still somehow on his face. "The lady's goin' to a lotta effort here to try and teach us! The last thing she wants is some celibate roach tellin' her how stupid she is! I mean, we only just met her!"

Everyone turned back, frowning at him. He was _sticking up _for a doctor?!

Eddie scoffed, fidgeting about in his chair in agitation.

Joker sat back down, clearing his throat and gesturing towards Dr Quinzel, like he was allowing her to carry on.

"So, um, I thought we could start by saying what things you think are minor actions you can do wrong, and then major bad things you could do." she said, her eyes focused on the Clown Prince again.

Ivy put her hand up, yet Dr Quinzel wasn't looking, she was staring at Joker, whether she noticed she was or not. He grinned, turning his head from her to look at Pam, fluttering his eyelashes. Ivy let out a groan of disgust which attracted the young doctor's attention.

"Yes, Ivy."

"Well one of the most minor things you can do is probably something like telling lies. And the worst thing you could ever do is litter." Ivy explained with determination, narrowing her eyes towards the green haired Joker who whispered "Oh god, she's gonna go on about her plants again..." to Tetch who sat on the row in front of him. Tetch chuckled and she growled.

"That's enough Joker, everyone's entitled to their opinion." Dr Quinzel said softly, crossing her arms over.

"Yeah? Well all Pammie cares about is her slimy plants. That's the only committed relationship she _can't_ get out of!" The others held in their laughs, but Joker let his ring out, and Ivy stood up, the chair crashing to the floor as she stormed out.

Dr Quinzel sighed.

"Guess Pammie takes education seriously..." Joker muttered, shrugging and making a face. As everyone looked at Ivy's abandoned chair with worry, Dr Quinzel realized she was smiling at the trouble maker, and he winked back, causing her to blush furiously.

Shaking her head, she continued with the lesson, she knew Ivy would have been taken care of, so there was no need to stop because of her.

And all the way through, she noticed something...

Despite the little scuffle at the beginning, it seemed that Joker was on his best behaviour.

How long was _that _going to last?


	3. Chapter 3

**The Arkham Approach**

The corridors of Arkham seemed fairly quiet and forlorn compared to the week before. The Maximum Security wing was calm and peaceful, apart from a melodic tune coming from the end cell, where the patient whistled a tune.

Joker was the one whistling the melody, his relaxed figure lay over his cot, arms folded behind his head, his eyes closed. A hollow knock came from the other side of his steel bolted door.

He continued his improvised song, rolling himself over to face the breechblock wall. His door's hinge wrenched open, the heavy, subdued slam and dainty high heels told him he had a visitor. The visitor looked around the room to find him, their gaze finally landing on his back, and they cleared their throat. He didn't turn, he just smiled, dragging out one last long whistle.

Another throat was cleared.

"Joker," Dr Quinzel addressed, composing herself.

Joker opened his eyes, maddening green met with the dull grey of the wall, her voice forcing his smile into a full, twisted grin and his ears pricked up when he heard her shoes click closer.

"It's been a week since I last saw you," she continued, not fazed that he hadn't even answered her or acknowledged that she was even there. "have you decided on whether you'd like to continue the educational reform program?"

When he didn't reply she took a cautious step forwards, and gently patted his shoulder, attempting to get his attention.

Joker flipped over immediately and she panicked, starting back so that she faced him from at least a metre away. His grin seemed to spread even wider as he sat upright, placing his arms calmly by his sides.

"Yep Doc!" he exclaimed with a heavy, content sigh. "I've decided that I'd_ love_ to continue your kooky lessons!"

"Well... _great!_" Harleen gasped, unable to conceal her own smile.

Something in Joker's eyes seemed to flicker as he watched her proud emotion, and he suddenly seemed almost out of reality (or what was _his_ reality anyway) for a moment.

"On one condition," he added in a monotone voice, seemingly still lost in his thoughts or... mad schemes, and the tone he was using seemed really creepy because it was so out of his character. "and notice there's only _one_."

He sat himself further up, leaning his back against the wall, giggling when he felt his hair with the palm of his hand, realizing it was stuck up at various jaunty, misshapen angles. "The condition being," he continued, placing his arms by his sides again and running his hands over the covers a little. "that I only go to lessons that Iactually wanna do."

Dr Quinzel gazed at his hands, watching them slide effortlessly over the covers of his bed. She blinked a few times, looking at the ground instead - why did she always get distracted by him?

"Oh sure! I can do that for you Joker." she finally managed to reply, making sure to busy herself with her clipboard instead of having to look at him in any way. He let his grin drop into a smirk, his eyes burning into the clipboard she held in front of her face.

She flipped over some pages, and then slowly peered over the edge of her notes, feeling her face flush when she met his stare, his legs swinging over the edge of his cot as he smiled sweetly. "I-I... I can note down all of the lessons you're interested in now." she stammered, clumsily dropping all of her stuff on the floor. She unhooked her pen from the pocket on her lab coat, muttering curses to herself as she looked at the scattered papers over the ground and knelt down, scrambling her fingers over them.

Joker raised a brow, "Need help kid?"

"_No!_ No.. I'm... _uh_...I..."

He stood up before she could stop him and he crouched down next to her, making a pile of papers in his arms, just like she was, only in a calmer manner. He glanced over each paper, clearly taking everything in, but she was too busy feeling stupid to care.

He passed her the papers, his fingers lingering over her knuckles for a second as the paperwork was exchanged from his hands to hers. She looked up at him, her big blue eyes shimmering; He lifted his stare too, green calculating eyes glimmering. His hand was still brushing over her knuckle skin, and she didn't attempt to move him, even though she knew any kind of physical contact between doctor and patient was prohibited.

Joker made no sudden decision to back off, and held his place, and she seemed to be stuck under a spell, like she could only repeat what he was doing. In this stance, she noticed just how green his eyes were - had they been as emerald as they were now _before_ his "accident" ? How could his eyes be the pure green like they were? In that snapshot of time, she was fascinated by him... she was up close, almost close enough to deem the proximity as personal.

"Doc?" his voice came, it sounded so far away.

"_Doc?"_

_So green_, his eyes were _so green..._

_"Doc?!"_

Dr Quinzel jumped, eyes alert and then sane, as they looked at the pile of paperwork in front of her knees. "S-Sorry," she said, blinking as she slid the paper into her arms and started to get up off the floor. "I... I don't know what came over me."

Joker grinned, teeth greeting her, "I know toots! You were practically _dribbling _on me! _Heh!"_

She went a fierce red, and she felt as if she were burning as he giggled. "I know... I'm sorry, I'm being completely unprofessional... If we could just forget about what just occurred, and then you could tell me the lessons that you wish to study."

He stopped laughing, sitting back on his bed.

"Of course," he replied lowly, stroking his hands over the bedcovers again - would he ever stop with the distractions?! "Citizen studies..."

She nearly dropped everything again as she bent down to get her pen, but managed to hold her clipboard of papers awkwardly as she scribbled down what he was dictating.

"Art."

She let out a frustrated sigh when her pen's ink began to get fainter.

"Drama."

She carved the word into the lined paper, now that the pen had run out.

"Music."

Another engraved subject was added to the list.

"That's it Doc."

"You're sure?" she asked surprised, looking over her black framed spectacles at him, now they had fallen halfway down her nose. "Just four - "

"Yep."

"No literature or science?"

He made a face and then yawned dramatically, laying on his side on his uncomfortable slab of wood before rudely facing away from her.

"Naa, I think I'll pass Doc, Pammie's gonna show up at the so called "useful", boring-ass classes. So I'd rather do the fun ones - and I think I'm allergic to her perfume anyway..."

Perfume? Surely by now, after all of these years Joker had been here, he knew that none of the patients were allowed to use perfume...

Dr Quinzel tried to conceal her giggle, but failed to.

The laughter must have been like a masterpiece to Joker's ears, for he sat to attention immediately, eyes wide with shock and lips slowing stretching into a snide smirk.

"Which lessons do _you_ teach Doc?" he asked hoarsely, running a hand through his sticky-up hair. She gulped as her eyes followed his fingers as they tugged at his locks. She was soon drawn back to his face when he winked at her, smiling as he bit down on his tongue. "I-I teach music and citizen studies, and sometimes drama. But I'm also available for educational therapy sessions - it's just like normal therapy, but it has a friendlier approach."

He arched one green brow.

"Ooh, so in theory, I could use these "educational therapy" sessions as a form of private study - I mean with a doctor supervising and helping me out, of course! _Heh!"_ he said enthusiastically, looking at her weirdly.

Dr Quinzel tapped the back of her clipboard with her fingers, "I-I don't see why not. But see how much you like the open lessons with the others first. And bear in mind, that whoever is your current doctor will be your guide to the sessions."

Joker's face fell in disappointment, his current doctor was not fun one bit.

Dr Quinzel on the other hand...

"Well," he muttered, giving her another wink as a grin then spread across his features. "I'm going to have to do something about that, aren't I?"


	4. Chapter 4

**The Arkham Approach **

"You're joking right?" Two-Face growled, slamming a fist down onto the table, making his lunch tray - and everything placed precariously on it, tremble vigorously. "You're _the Joker_! Since when did you care about reform?!"

The Joker grinned, holding his own grey lunch tray in his hands, gesturing towards the empty plastic seat that was opposite Harvey.

"Is this seat taken?" he asked politely, innocently sitting down despite the glare Two-Face gave him as he gently placed his food tray down. He shoved the plastic straw he'd been given into the drinks carton (a straw he'd been allowed every day since he'd been on good behaviour this week). He began to slurp loudly, forcing Harvey to cringe with anger.

"J, what's the idea this time? What kind of plan could possibly involve five lessons of citizen studies every week? It's not like a plan to become a better person is ever gonna get you outta here!"

Joker looked at him, a brief silence came over them and he blinked a few times. Then he blinked again as he looked down at his tray, prodding the hardened bread on the grilled cheese sandwich.

"Ohh... this takes me back..." he murmured to himself with a chuckle, grabbing the stale sandwich and snatching a hungry bite out of it, regardless of its condition. He gulped it down. "Ah well," he said with disappointment. "At least the _cheese_ is good."

Harvey snarled, and grabbed him by the orange collar of his overalls, sending half of his own food flying down to the floor.

"Listen Clown!" the half burnt man spat, guards already heading to their table from the other side of the cafeteria. "I don't know what you're playin' at but folks ain't too happy about... you gettin' all these privileges just 'cause you're on good behaviour! We don't get nothin' if _we_ are! Just extra recreation time! I know you're up to something and when I find out I'm gonna - "

Two guards grabbed Dent, a couple more rushing to the other side of the table to restrain Joker - but they were surprised to see that Joker merely sat there, with a surprised look on his face and a "hand-on-heart" pose. Usually they expected that he would retaliate violently, but he'd just sat there... looking appalled.

"Wow Harv..." he suddenly spoke, watching his 'friend' being dragged away from him. "What's gotten into you?"

Two-Face began yelling at Joker, but his shouts were then muffled when the guards took him out of the cafeteria and back to his cell. The other guards that had been sent to retrieve Joker stood awkwardly, watching him take another heavy slurp of his drink.

"Uh... I guess we'd better get going..." one of them said, wide eyed as he faced the Joker.

Their radios suddenly burst with a crackled message about something to do with one of the other patients, and then they were gone.

Joker took another chunk out of his sandwich, completely aware that the room had fell silent and all eyes were on him. He paused, gulping the food down. Then he lifted his head, looking at the room all around him.

Everyone looked away from him and then the habitual chatter and kitchen noises resumed, making him smile to himself.

He finished the rest of his sandwich, and then snatched his hands around the cupcake he'd chosen.

As he was about to take a bite, his eyes caught a flash of blonde and white to his far right, where the lunch line was. He knew immediately who it was and dropped his cake back on the tray.

It was nothing out of the ordinary to see doctors eating with the patients at lunchtime, mainly because a lot of them could see how their patients would act in a conventional scenario, such as eating and chatting. But Joker was surprised to see Dr Quinzel here... he knew that she hadn't been assigned to anyone yet, much to his own disappointment. But he was working on that...

He could see the bright white of her lab coat coming closer, heading for his table. He suddenly panicked, clearing his throat and licking his hand in order to attempt to smooth his green locks down into a neat fashion. He leaned back a little, trying to appear casual, but he knew he wasn't quite pulling it off.

"Joker," Dr Quinzel began, even before she'd fully reached his table, suddenly noticing his odd behaviour. "Uh... may I have a seat?"

He nodded without delay.

"Of course!" he exclaimed, giving her a wink.

"I'm sorry to intrude, I just forgot my money today and I had no other option for lunch so - "

"Hey," Joker interrupted, pointing at her with one hand, the cupcake in the other. "You're here toots, no need for an explanation. Now, what brings you to _my_ table?"

"Well... I...was the one who has been told to deliver some... unfortunate news Joker." she said quietly, looking down at the food on her tray. He sat up straight, frowning - was it the Bat? Dead? So soon?!

"Your doctor was found dead in his home this morning... So you will no longer be in his treatment."

"Oh. What a terrible shame... How did he die?" he mocked, already knowing exactly who, what, where and when.

"The GCPD are still trying to figure that out... they're trying to distinguish whether it was murder or suicide." Harleen replied, looking up at him, noticing a flicker of amusement in his eyes, yet she said nothing.

"So, I suppose this means I'm free to choose who I want to replace my old Doc then?" he asked, already knowing the answer but trying not to show that he found the situation immensely funny.

Harleen looked taken aback, but then quickly faced downwards as she placed her spoon in the pasta she'd bought. "I-I suppose, yes." she answered shyly, feeling flushed.

He watched her intently with wide green eyes as she began to spoon her pasta into her mouth, taking a bite of his cupcake, crumbs clinging to his lips as he chewed.

"Do you have any ideas on who your replacement doctor is to be?" she asked quietly, never lifting her eyes to meet his, which were burning as they stared into her face.

"Ohhh... let's just say I have a certain doctor in mind." Joker hinted, eating more of his cupcake, his mouth full. "I mean, they've already been such a great help to me already, I really feel like they understand me, y'know?"

Harleen felt the blush reaching her cheeks and she cleared her throat, actually looking across the table to face him now. He gazed back at her, grinning from ear to ear. "Everyone wants someone to understand them, don't they?" he whispered, making her eyes widen and breath quicken uncontrollably. "Just someone to listen to them... no matter how bad their evil deeds are."

"Yes." she replied, feeling hypnotized as she stared into his mesmerizing green eyes, watching the madness swirling within them.

"Everyone gets tired of being hated at some point," he breathed, wearing a serious emotion. "When everyone's praising the Bat, and cursing your name when your back's turned... that ain't no fun..."

She winced a little. "I know what that's like..." she muttered to herself, placing her spoon in the bowl of pasta and looking down at it depressingly.

He slipped his arms across the table quietly, taking both her hands that rested on its surface. She let out a gasp and her eyes widened, but she made no effort to shove him away. She made no sound and just stared at him in shock.

"Then what if two hated people could come together?" he whispered, never faltering as he squeezed her hands in his. He found it strange how she hadn't alerted the guards, and also that no one else had noticed this going on... and weirdly, he was enjoying it.

"Imagine, two people who understand each other's pain, despair, evil..." he continued, pulling her arms towards him slightly, her chair scraping over the floor as she was pulled as close to the table as she could be. "That's rare, y'know? Finding someone who understands a madman."

Harleen suddenly could hear her heartbeat in her ears, as his fingers roughly slid over hers. Her breath caught and she pulled away from him to stand, blushing furiously.

"I-I'm sorry Joker, I have somewhere to be. Excuse me." she stammered quickly, leaving her lunch tray and rushing off.

Joker frowned, suddenly facing an empty seat and unfinished pasta bowl.

But then he smiled.

It looked like he was going to get his favourite doctor after all.


End file.
